Mornings are spent rushing to get to school, to work, to a meeting, to another day. I have no more time to lie in bed for a little bit to listen to the sounds a house makes in the early hours, or watch the sunlight trace a fine glow of rainbow colors along the floor.
The day's first meal is eaten at a run, or not at all, the smell of fresh coffee lost in the mad race to the car.
The children are given a quick hug and kiss goodbye and it is only after they have left that I realize that I had not wished the youngest one luck in his math quiz, or reminded the oldest daughter to be careful while on the road, or the teen-aged son a thank-you for helping me with something computer related. Soon they will grow out of my reach and I will never have it like this again.
It would be a fine thing if I could, if only for a day, sit down and watch time pass without worrying about how much of it has dribbled away. I would sit and watch the leaves dance, the wind an invisible partner. If I am lucky, I might even get to know the little bird who sits often among the branches of the lime tree and get the little birdhouse finally put up as a gesture of friendship.
No matter that my coffee has turned cold - it only means that I had the leisure to sip it slowly, cradling the cup in my hands till all the warmth had gone away.
Never mind that I am hearing the same bit of trivia about space from my youngest one -- I am glad that I have the spare moment to listen to it again and again and delight in the look on his face as he explains to me how a star dies and how a new one is born.
And as the house winds down in the evening, I can go from room to room to say goodnight, taking the time to linger in each one to look back on the day that was. The day when I had enough time.
6 comments:
Following from 40+! Love the teacup ring!
I so now how this feels, and with me it's my own fault. I drive myself constantly and never allow myself to just sit back and enjoy some time...oh that I would, just once.
I love your blog! This one actually made me sit down for a minute and breathe!
I can really relate even though I don't have children. I worry about not seeing or spending enough time with my parents and I am saddened.
I can't tell you how often my coffee grows cold...no matter, it's still enjoyable.
My youngest is just about to fly the coop and I will so miss our uneventful moments together...where did the time go?
I plan to enjoy my day off tomorrow...hoping to relax and do whatever or not much:)
Take care!
@diane -- didn't i tell you once to listen to your body and rest every now and then? :-)
@ wendy - i am so glad i helped make you sit still for a bit. you have been running around and tiring yourself my friend.
@mamatink -- yes i do LOVE that ring. it's sooo cute. it's made by an artfire artisan.
@christine - yes, where did it go? my youngest is in 6th grade and is now embarrassed to be seen being dropped off at school by his mom. and he was still such a baby yesterday!
@tazim - and i am sure your parents miss you just as much. don't worry -- you will be given the time to spend with them.
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